Script Review: [NicoNico] Fate/Zero – 14 This entry was posted by brainchild.
I haven’t seen the first season, but luckily, the mistakes I point out don’t require any prior knowledge of FSN.
Stuff is happening.
r/a/ge level: 10/100. Honorifics are present. NicoNico uses Western name order. No translations for the opening and ending. No one cares about NicoNico.
“If this was anything like a monster movie, we’d be goners.”
The fuck? “All of our efforts are barely enough to keep it from coming ashore.”
Observer > eyewitness.
“This is getting out of hand” or “This is now beyond our control.”
No > not. Somewhat debatable.
“Yet even their combined strength isn’t enough to kill that disgusting thing?”
Further > more.
No comma after pest.
“Learn your place, mongrel!”
If any of the rip groups have mongrel capitalized, they better hire some new editors. I mean, would you capitalize “bitch” or “fucker”? (The answer is no.)
Heaven should be capitalized, or it could be changed to divine providence or something.
Uh-huh…
What I liked:
It’s not Shakespeare, but it’s understandable. The exchange with Rin’s dad and Disgustingface was okay, but everything could use some sprucing up – sprucing up that I’m not willing to waste any more time on.
What I didn’t like:
Lackluster phrasing choices and some errors by NicoNico.
Overall Grade: 3 Noble Phantasms… out of 5.