Script/typesetting review: [Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ – 02

Yes, that's the name of the show.

Yes, that’s the name of the show.

Now with 100% less AT-X.

Editing
Typesetting
Grades

Editing

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_00.26_[2013.08.06_18.37.56]

Why not “Prez” or “Pres”? I guarantee “President” will probably be too long sooner or later. Just shooting yourself in the foot.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_00.39_[2013.08.06_18.40.04]

What is hoboro-yaki? No seriously, what is it? Even I have no idea what that is. Also, a bunch of foods are translated later in the episode, so ???

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_00.47_[2013.08.06_18.41.34]

on->in

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_00.53_[2013.08.06_18.42.58]

I don’t think you need a linebreak for a line this short, especially considering how small the font is.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_01.03_[2013.08.06_18.44.18]

Oh god, I was dreading this. Why bring attention to how she ends her sentences? Just because she may use a little different ending particles does not mean you need to tack on something to the translation, because people do not do this in English.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_02.38_[2013.08.06_18.51.13]

See above.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_03.31_[2013.08.06_18.56.00]

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_03.32_[2013.08.06_18.57.48]

No->Nope or No->I haven’t.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_03.39_[2013.08.06_19.00.03]

There has to be a better way to translate that than “class cleaning duty monitor”.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_03.45_[2013.08.06_19.01.18]

Thank you for adding some character to your subs and not being painfully literal like the last review I did.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_04.08_[2013.08.06_19.03.10]

I mean, I know it’s supposed to go together with “played”, but “unplayed-with animals” is still very weird.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_04.23_[2013.08.06_19.06.24]

“I won at rock-paper-scissors.”

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.03_[2013.08.06_19.08.02]

This show is really pushing the whole “aggressive” thing, huh?

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.17_[2013.08.06_19.11.48]

Is this supposed to be the alt dialogue style? The border color isn’t different enough, IMO.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.43_[2013.08.06_19.18.33]

Period outside of the quotation marks? Does Nishi-Taku use British English?

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_06.09_[2013.08.06_19.29.18]

i cry everytim @ Onee-samas

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_06.59_[2013.08.06_19.35.44]

Hi I like this why can’t you do this for the other girl’s verbal tic because that would be way better and less awkward thanks for your time.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_07.12_[2013.08.06_19.37.19]

This isn’t a question?

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_09.11_[2013.08.06_19.46.18]

“Congrats on the Photography Club”.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_09.13_[2013.08.06_19.47.42]

“New President”, if it’s supposed to be a direct address.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_09.19_[2013.08.06_19.50.17]

sigh

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_12.04_[2013.08.06_19.54.45]

See above about quotation marks and periods.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_13.50_[2013.08.06_20.00.59]

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_13.52_[2013.08.06_20.02.02]

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_13.54_[2013.08.06_20.03.03]

Thanks for not ignoring these puns like some people would (however unfunny they may be).

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_16.23_[2013.08.06_20.24.20]

I like this.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_22.49_[2013.08.06_20.46.39]

This is not a question either.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_24.42_[2013.08.06_20.49.33]

I believe that exclamation point belongs outside the quotation marks, m8.

Typesetting

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_01.20_[2013.08.06_18.47.47]

This font is not even close.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_02.38_[2013.08.06_18.51.13]

The font should have more blur.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.15_[2013.08.06_19.09.47]

>typeset sign
>dialogue is in front of it the entire time so no one can read it

Good job.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.23_[2013.08.06_19.13.17]

This goes by so fast I had to pause to read it so… good job?

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.26_[2013.08.06_19.15.36]

I’d go with a font that has bigger serifs.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.29_[2013.08.06_19.16.59]

More blur. Also what are with the []? People don’t use them in English like that.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.43_[2013.08.06_19.18.33]

Much better amount of blur.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_05.48_[2013.08.06_19.20.59]

Bottom part is too dark.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_06.18_[2013.08.06_19.30.23]

The photographer part is too dark. The colors for the part on the right are wrong. The “Honorable Mention” doesn’t have enough blur.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_06.26_[2013.08.06_19.32.40]

This part is too dark too.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_06.37_[2013.08.06_19.33.55]

And now the sign is too small to read.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_08.50_[2013.08.06_19.42.36]

Should get bigger as it comes toward the screen.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_08.53_[2013.08.06_19.45.16]

The color on these is a little, like… purple? It should be more grayish.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_09.11_[2013.08.06_19.46.18]

No problems.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_12.50_[2013.08.06_19.57.08]

The color may match on the right side, but it sure doesn’t on the left side.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_13.37_[2013.08.06_19.58.41]

This is fine.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_13.45_[2013.08.06_19.59.37]

Should’ve used the same font for the exclamation point as you used for the first part.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_16.08_[2013.08.06_20.22.08]

The one sign a few above this should look more like this.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_18.09_[2013.08.06_20.37.28]

Looks good.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_18.55_[2013.08.06_20.39.17]

I don’t really understand the placement.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_18.56_[2013.08.06_20.39.35]

More blur pls.

[Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ - 02 [720P Hi10P][9C68E531].mkv_snapshot_24.42_[2013.08.06_20.49.33]

I hope the problem here is obvious.

Grades

Editing: 4.5/5. While there are some issues, they put a lot of effort into some things that an average release wouldn’t. I mean, I hate how they handled some stuff, but I have to give them props for the rest.

Typesetting: C+. I feel like whoever typeset this knew how to typeset, but just didn’t put very much effort into it.

Timing: Mostly good, but a few lines ended too early because they were snapped to “fake” keyframes.

This entry was posted by herkz.

4 thoughts on “Script/typesetting review: [Nishi-Taku] Tamayura ~more aggressive~ – 02

  1. >Period outside of the quotation marks? Does Nishi-Taku
    >use British English?

    The American quotation rules are bullshit. Convince me otherwise.

    • Doesn’t matter. If they want to use American English for the rest, they should use American English rules for quotations.

      • They don’t really have to, and there’s plenty of fansubs that don’t. Underwater’s standard is to use American English but British quotation style, and you should know it’s allowed on a show-by-show basis at Commie too (e.g. SNAFU last season). All that really matters is to be consistent with it.

        • Well IMO they should. It’s pretty silly to not use American English rules if the subs are in American English.

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