Translation review: [DameDesuYo] Hanamonogatari 01

DDY staff asked me to review their release after they got negative feedback from Nyaa mods. I know it’s taken a while to get down to it, but better late than never. On the other hand, Monogatari is a pain in the ass to check, so don’t expect much.

Matter

Not that reviews matter. Not at all.

Metaphor

This could be phrased way better. Or you could just use a similar metaphor well known in the west.

Pain

This line and the all following few that expand its idea are outright wrong. It’s not that Kanbaru’s life is a burden on others, but that life is a burden on her, troublesome, annoying – but not because she’s exceptional, but because she’s weak.

She

Just “she”. This whole idea of giving あの人 (ano hito), a perfectly normal (though slightly distanced) third person “pronoun” deeper meaning or even emphasizing it is just misleading.

Nil

Also, I get it that you try to push a latin feel into the scene numbering, but “unnumbered” isn’t “nothing” (what “nulla” means).

I

This line is hard to fully understand too. “She kept saying stuff like that, that I wasn’t sure I fully understood…”

Wrong

The question is why would she run away with Kanbaru’s father.

Phrasing

“Precious” is a terrible choice of words here. The phrasing in general is misleading. “It’s not my own will that I care for you. Some god must be forcing me.”

Rough

This line and the following show a rough understanding of the context, but that doesn’t make them any less horribly wrong. (Where did that “suggest” come from at all?)

Ignorance

“Ignorance is bliss, not a sin.”

Newspaper

Not deciphering and translating it all? Son, I’m disappoint.

Why

Put some effort into editing, please. This line hurt me.

What

I mean, I know Kanbaru is perfection, but this line is still bad. The next line is wrong too.

Just no

This translation couldn’t possibly be more off. It’s basically the exact opposite of what’s being said.

No

No. That “like everyone else” is just wrong. Also, “greedy” instead of “selfish”.

No

Just kill yourselves. Not getting such an obvious FMA reference is a mortal sin. Die. This was the last drop, you crossed the line. I’m three minutes in and there are already a Hadena-tier number of errors.

Conclusion: Avoid

Accuracy: 4/10; Flow: 7/10; Atmosphere: 5/10

Full of mistranslations and bad English. Whoever did this should just go back to Translation 101.

This entry was posted by Vale.

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